BECOMING JEWISH
  • Welcome to Becoming Jewish!
  • What's New?
  • Reading Recommendations
  • About Our Rabbis
  • Jewish Places in the Bay Area
  • What Do I Have to Do to Become Jewish?
  • Why Be Jewish?
  • Online Jewish Resources
  • Our Conversion Stories
  • Judaism FAQ
  • Contact Us
  • Blog: Into the Jewish Pool
  • Media Coverage
  • Converting Outside the USA
  • Conversion Videos

Speak up! Be part of your own learning

6/14/2019

0 Comments

 
Picture
This week Rabbi Avi Shulman of Temple Beth Torah in Fremont sent out a this message to his congregation.

One of my favorite passages in Pirkei Avot consists of three couplets by Hillel. Here they are interspersed with my own comments:

“A boor does not fear sin,
And the ignorant cannot be models of piety.”
 
It’s striking that the English word for an oaf echoes the Hebrew word ‘bor.’ A ‘bor’ is an empty pit, which is synonymous with someone who is empty-headed. 
Above all else, Hillel valued knowledge of Torah. Yet he esteemed knowledge not merely for its own sake but so learning would lead to righteous behavior.
 
“A bashful person does not learn,
And the short-tempered cannot teach.”
 
I can recall many students who would sit quietly in class while others did most of the talking. Yet Hillel reminds students to speak-up. Productive learning takes place when students are engaged. Just as importantly, it is vital for teachers to welcome class in-put and participation. Instructors who are short-tempered intimidate their students, deteriorating the learning environment.  
 
“Not all who succeed in business are wise.
In a place where there are no people* strive to be one.”
 
Hillel reminds us not to give undue deference to people who are successful in business. Tevye in Fiddler in the Roof may long to be a rich man, singing “When you are rich they think you really know.” Hillel informs us that material success is not synonymous with wisdom. 
 
In the concluding verse, Hillel admonishes us to act morally even when others are behaving inhumanely.  He encourages us to strive for virtue, even when others are not. No matter the circumstances, Hillel inspires us to be our best selves, to aspire to be a mensch. 


This is a message that I want students to take to heart. 
SPEAK UP
DON'T STAY WITH A TEACHER WHO IS INTIMIDATING

Jewish tradition values study, questions, and argument (for the sake of heaven). Don't be silent. Participate in your own learning.
 
*The original, as you can imagine, says “man” or mensch – a good person. Where there are no good people, strive to be one. You can read the original text here. 

0 Comments

Attending Shiva - some guidelines

6/2/2019

0 Comments

 
Picture
Recently Rabbi Cory Helfand of Peninsula Sinai Congregation sent out a very useful guide to attending shiva - especially for first timers. He gave me permission to share it.







​Attending Shiva
 
Shiva calls can be hard to make, especially if it is your first time. The information below aims to help prepare you to make a shiva call. Learn how to give comfort to Jewish relatives or friends in mourning.
 
Enter the shiva house quietly
Mourners are not expected to greet people at the door, and you don't want to interrupt if the service has already begun. Give a quiet knock, and then quietly walk inside the house. Please do not ring the doorbell.
 

Enter the room of the mourner quietly
The best way to greet the mourner is to sit down quietly near him or her. There is no expectation of a "greeting" between the mourner and the shiva caller. But if you want to give the mourner a hug or handshake, then you can do this. However, try to avoid everyday lines like "How are you?"
 
Respond to the mourner
If the mourner speaks to you, respond. But if they are quiet, then it is okay just to sit quietly in the room. It is tiring for the mourner to talk all day long, and he or she might prefer to just sit quietly in your company. If the mourner wants to talk, spend time listening and if the space presents itself, talk about the person who has passed away. If the mourner feels like talking, you can tell stories and share memories about the person who passed away with the mourner. Everyone mourns differently, and shiva is the time to be present for the mourner in whatever way is most meaningful to them. 
 
Food and drinks
Mourners are not expected to be hosts, but those who are close to the mourners might offer some refreshments to shiva callers. It is acceptable if you want to bring some refreshments to the home - nuts, dried fruit, cakes, casseroles ... - for the bereaved family, but remember to respect the level of kosher observance of the shiva home.
 
Traditional Statement of Comfort in Judaism
The following statement of comfort is traditionally said to mourners - in Hebrew or English - just before leaving the shiva house.
 
May God comfort you among the other mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.
Ha-Makom y'nachem et'chem b'toch sha'ar aveilei Tzion v'Yerushalayim.
 
Leave the shiva house quietly
Again, mourners are not expected to be hosts and see people to the door. Some people say the traditional line above, nod to the bereaved, and then leave quietly. Others give the mourners a hug or hand shake, and walk out quietly.

0 Comments

    Thoughts from our Email List

    Hopefully our blog entries will concern issues that matter to YOU, the curious about Judaism.  Please let us know what you'd like to read about!

    Categories

    All
    After Conversion
    Anti Semitism
    Beit Din
    Blessings
    Child Conversion
    Christmas
    Circumcision
    Connecting
    Conservative Judaism
    Conversion Process
    Dating/relationships
    Death/Shiva
    Find A Rabbi
    God
    Hanukkah
    Hatafat Dam Brit
    Hebrew Name
    Hell
    History
    Holidays & Fast Days
    Interfaith
    Jewish Places
    Kashrut
    LGBT
    Mikvah
    Mitvot/Commandments
    Mourning
    Movements
    Non Jewish Family
    Non-Jewish Family
    Orthodox Judaism
    Parenting
    Passover
    Personal Stories
    Questions From Readers
    Reform Judaism
    Social Justice
    Spirituality
    Synagogues
    Torah
    Transgender
    Why Be Jewish?
    Yahrzeit

    RSS Feed

    Archives

    January 2023
    December 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    June 2020
    April 2020
    February 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    January 2019
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    March 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    October 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    August 2014
    May 2014
    March 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    July 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    August 2011
    May 2011
    December 2010
    November 2010
    October 2010
    September 2010

BecomingJewish.net is a great resource for anyone who is thinking about converting to Judaism or has recently become Jewish.