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A Eulogy that Got Me Thinking

5/26/2016

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Rabbi Yonathan Cohen of Beth Israel in Berkeley wrote this beautiful eulogy that brought up many thoughts. I want to share it with you.


A Hesped (Eulogy) for Bracha Tova

Rav Kook, a well known rabbi, philosopher and mystic, once explained that truth in its truest form must contain opposites; that truth in its essence must be paradoxical. 

Our dear friend, Bracha Tova was a seeker in this sense. Her search and quest for her own truth often led her to paradoxical conclusions, and at times, forced her to live in great spiritual tension. 

Though I've known Bracha Tova for the past ten years, I got to know her really well over the last three years as she began attending services at Beth Israel on a regular basis. In the last year and a half of her life, we would often go on long walks, sometimes once a week, sometimes less. In each of those walks, Bracha Tova was looking for ways to make peace between competing visions she had, mainly of herself, but also of family, and community, and the Divine. 

In one of those walks, Bracha Tova and I explored the possibility of her taking on an additional Hebrew name. The name she would have chosen was Shleimah, coming from the same root word of Shalom (peace), it means wholeness. She ultimately did not take on this name, but it was very clear that as her life was coming to an end in this world, wholeness was a goal she set for herself. 

We, who at times, might of constrained her personal quest, her inner sense of self, through our at times limited understandings of truth, peace, wholeness, and the nature of the divine, now seek her forgiveness - knowing simultaneously that at her final months and days she deeply felt our love and witnessed it in our words and deeds. 

I believe that Bracha Tova left this world with a sense of Shleimut, a sense of wholeness. With a good blessing, a Bracha Tova. 

During one of my last visits to Bracha Tova, I noticed two pigeons dwelling in the bird house hanging on the window pane of her room. One was white and the other was spotted with multiple colors. Two birds dwelling in one home, nourishing from one water source. After a while the pigeons took flight and disappeared into the sky. 

In her passage from this world, Bracha Tova found a home for her soul. Even her many souls. Her wings are open, she has taken flight, the heavens can now truly be her dwelling place. 

May her memory be a blessing, a Bracha Tova to us all.

I am fascinated by this concept that "truth in its truest form must contain opposites; that truth in its essence must be paradoxical."  This has started me down a new study path.  Have you come across an word or sentence that sent you to research and learn more?


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Questions to Becoming Jewish:  I want to do what the Heavenly Father wants me to do...

1/16/2013

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We get many questions on becomingjewish.net, and we try to give thoughtful answers.  We decided to post several of these, from time to time, to give others the benefit of these replies.  Do you have a question you need answered?  Write us!


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"I am not sure if I am considering conversion or not. I am just looking for truth (not man’s truth, but Heavenly Father’s truth). I would love to have someone point me in the right direction and maybe answer some questions from me. My goal is to live my life the way Heavenly Father wants me to. I am very interested in reading things on keeping Kosher as well."

Dawn's answer:  
Let me see if I can help out.  Judaism does not believe there is one single truth, not even God's truth, that can be known by humans.  So we as humans struggle to do our best to understand as much as we can and to act according to that which we can grasp.  But Judaism is very forgiving of human foibles.  Additionally, we are guided by our rabbis and sages who themselves do not agree on everything so a Jew, in order to live an observant life, must learn and study from many points of view to determine what he or she will take on.  Are there lazy Jews who don't bother or atheist Jews who see no point? Yes.  Are they going to be punished or go to hell?  No. We don't believe in hell.  The consequence of not making an effort to live according to the commandments is simply a missed opportunity.  Those people are probably satisfied with their lives but in my opinion they have missed the chance to live a life of greater kavanah (intentionality).  

Judaism does not perceive God to have a gender.  However, Hebrew, like Spanish, is a gendered language so the references to God are often translationed use a male pronoun.  Rarely would a Jew refer to a Heavenly Father.  An observant Jew would refer to God as HaShem, which in Hebrew means The Name.  It is an honorific title like Majesty.

As for keeping kosher, that is complex and varies in numerous small ways from community to community since every community will keep to the ways of their parents and grandparents. So for example,  take the practice of waiting after a meat meal before eating a dairy food - one of my local rabbis is from Egypt and his Egyptian community's practice was to wait 3 hours. But he came to America where most Jews are of  Eastern European descent and wait 5 hours.  He had to change in order to be consistent with the practice of his American congregation.

If you want to pursue learning about kashrut (keeping kosher) there's a book that was recommended to me --

How to Keep Kosher:  A comprehensive Guide to Understanding Jewish Dietary Laws  by Lise Stern

You can probably ask for it through your library system if you don't know yet whether you want to own it.

If you would like to learn about the diverse ways that Jewish sages have thought about God this is a good book --

Finding God: Selected Responses  by Rifat Sonsino and Daniel B. Syme

Here's a description of it - Finding God, by way of essays on significant Jewish thinkers, attempts to answer the questions looming above us all: What is God? Is there more than one God? How can we know God? What does God "want" from us? How does God relate to me? 

Does this help?  If you have more questions just let me know.  I wish you success in your journey.






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