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How Did You Pick the Right Rabbi?  Our 5th Response:

7/10/2012

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​Both my husband and I were raised Catholic, with 12 years of education in Catholic schools. It never really clicked for either of us, aside from the ethics, the social justice lessons. We too shopped around, visiting a variety of east bay congregations on and off for about 2 years while I was taking classes at Lehrhaus and various synagogues, attending High Holydays with different communities, and once I was pregnant, the idea of conversion took on a new urgency. While we'd enjoyed and felt interested at several congregations, I didn't really 
feel a strong pull towards the clergy or the community at any particular gathering. 
It wasn't until we visited Temple Sinai that I felt I'd found my teacher.

We were at the erev services up in the small chapel, and Rabbi Chester was leading services. At some point, after a specific prayer or song (I think it was the shehechianu) he asked everyone to sing it again, because it just didn't have the zing he was looking for. And he was right. I loved it that he called everyone to wake up and get their game on. That's when I knew he was the teacher for me. 

I met with Rabbi Chester for about 4 or 5 months, every 2-4 weeks, while I read This is My God by Herman Wouk, and another book about the great Rabbis. It was a somewhat scary and yet exhilarating time. I was afraid that we would be viewed as weirdos (we probably were, but so what). We really wanted to find a community where we could enjoy services, learn, raise our kids, and participate without conflicting emotions or compromise. I have to hand it to my husband, because he was so supportive and on board for this priority. 

Finally about a month before my due date, I had my beit din and visited the mikvah. it was such a beautiful day, start to finish. I remember Rabbi Berlin telling me to imagine myself falling into the hands of God as I submerged into the mikvah. Later we went to Stinson beach and had a quiet time at the ocean. Aside from my wedding, and the births of each of my children, I consider that day one of the most beautiful, satisfying, and divine days of my life.

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How did you find the right rabbi? Another response:

7/8/2012

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​I confess that I didn't really "shop" for a rabbi.  Once I realized that what I'd been looking for all my life was Judaism, I contacted the only rabbi I knew.  My partner was Jewish, and she liked that rabbi, and since all I knew was I WANTED A RABBI NOW, I called him.  He spent most of our first meeting telling me to slow down and explaining that conversion takes time.

Seems to have worked out just fine; I have just celebrated sixteen happy years of being a Jew.

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How did you find the right rabbi? 3rd response:

7/7/2012

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My experience was less than "normal." I had attended a few services and met a few Rabbis, but didn't feel a strong sense of connection. On a whim I chose to go to shul that no one had recommended, but ended up being the most perfect situation I could ask for. The Rabbi was so welcoming and helped me navigate the service. Afterward he properly introduced himself to me and invited me to set-up a meeting with him. His approach was always, "This is about you, not me. If it is ever not the right path, we can stop. I lose nothing if you chose this isn't for you." We talked, read books, and made plans to attend holiday celebrations. It was a loose form of structure and it really worked for me. The congregation was small, and everyone was so loving and supportive. It was like coming home every time I was there. 

5.5 months into the process my Rabbi informed me that he was moving. He felt like I was ready, but I didn't feel like I had the community I needed just yet, so we chose to find me a new Rabbi to complete the process. I met briefly with my new Rabbi to ensure it was a good fit, and was on my own for another month-and-a-half before we were able to meet again. At our second meeting, as we were talking, he asked me, "What are you waiting for?" It was clear to him as well that I was ready. So, 6-ish months and 2 Rabbis later, here I am!

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How did you find the right rabbi? 2nd Response:

7/6/2012

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​I can speak from my own experience.  It will be just a little different.  I chose the congregation or the synagogue before I chose my rabbi, I must confess.  I felt very comfortable and welcome at Beth Am.  Then it was a matter of going to service there a few times plus reading the online bios of the different rabbis online.  Knowing that Rabbi Adam is liberal and has a degree in history, as well as going to rabbinic schooling, made me feel very comfortable to talk to him.  History is my favorite subject.  This is why I felt we will have something in common right off the bat. For me, it worked beautifully, and I am grateful to both you, Dawn, and to Rabbi Adam for all the help and support I received from you along my conversion journey.

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NEW QUESTION: How did you find the right rabbi for your conversion?

7/5/2012

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​From a female Reform convert:


As you probably know, I love this question!  Because I think each of us has our own journey.  It's not quite the same for any of us.

I knew I wanted to look into conversion with a rabbi.  I took a couple of classes, and met some fabulous rabbis through the Taste and Intro classes.  One rabbi, who is local to the Bay Area, was part of the Intro process, and I really liked her style.  She was so intelligent and knowledgeable, and welcomed questions during classes.  So I emailed her.  But after one week of not hearing anything, I emailed her again, using the email address I found on the synagogue website.  When she didn't respond to that, I phoned the office and left a message.  I didn't hear back from that, either.

I thought to myself, maybe this is the "you have to ask the rabbi three times so they can make sure you're serious," but when asking around, I found that reform rabbis don't do that.  So I gave up on that rabbi, and continued my search.

I consider myself lucky that I didn't take that first leap, because I found the perfect rabbi for me just a month later, also in Intro class.  She had a warmth about her that was really genuine, and seemed concerned about me personally.  Once I got into the study process, I liked the fact that she actually had lesson plans and vocabulary lists -- ask any of my friends, and they'll tell you I like structure -- and it wasn't just about reading a book and report back once a month, which I had heard how some rabbis work.  So, this style of study was perfect for me.  I really couldn't have made a better choice, and I feel lucky to have found Rabbi Mates-Muchin, and that she was willing to study with me.

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