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Going to the Mikvah: My Experience, by CC

10/5/2010

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This is a topic dear to me!
 
My mikvah/beit din/Torah-giving event was at Beth Jacob.  I'd never seen a mikvah before, and nor had the 6 or so guests I had there.  Before the beit din started, Rabbi took us all on a mini field trip to look at the mikvah, and he made some comment about "so everyone doesn't wonder what it is.”  He volunteered to do this; we didn't ask.  Since the mikvah there is completely unremarkable, like a rather dingy therapy pool in an old people's home, no one actually said anything other than "oh, huh..."  
 
I was somewhat self-conscious as I walked from the beit din chapel past the guests, who were all sitting in the main sanctuary, because I knew that they knew I was going to get undressed and "take a bath.”  At the mikvah waiting room it was me and my wife and the three rabbis.  Rabbi explained the process and then I went in to the private area to shower and get into the mikvah, while outside my wife and the rabbis were chatting.  It all seemed very anti-climactic and "ordinary" and I was aware that my weeks of anxiety about it were completely pointless. Then, once I was in the water, which was surprisingly warm, Rabbi came into the private area and the door was open enough for the two women rabbis to hear my responses. 
 
Rabbi spoke, I repeated, I immersed.  We did that three times.  On the rising up on the third time I had a sudden and immense rush of emotion -- "I did it!"  The year of studying, the daily wonderings and feelings of not quite being there, suddenly they were all over -- I was now a Jew.  I was utterly thrilled.  Rabbi left, I got dressed and walked into the waiting room expecting my wife and the rabbis to be discussing me and my conversion, but it turned out they were talking about exercise and how one rabbi has a treadmill.  I said, "I thought you were talking about me," and one rabbi said, jokingly, "it's not all about you.”  And I said, "Yes, it is!" 
 
Then we did the Torah-giving service, and a few of us went to the Contemporary Jewish Museum in SF to have lunch and look around, as a celebration of the conversion.  My wife and I took the whole day off.  We both dressed up, me in a suit and tie.  I considered it a formal and very important occasion, no jeans and a T-shirt.
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